Dear Non-Golfer
Find a comfortable seat, and put aside your mobile phone for a minute or two. I know it’s tough, but do it. This won’t take long. I’m not going to hypnotise you, I promise - this is just an experiment. Just listen and breath.
I want you to forget all that you think you know about golf, and Golfers, for just this short time - suspend for just a brief moment all those preconceptions, and judgments - and together we will try and imagine a completely different game to the one you think you see.
Ready? Great. Turn the ringer off, please. OK…
I want you to imagine a game:
Where several million people also put aside their phones, and work stresses, and family worries, and for a few hours each week, walk in the fresh air.
Where thousands of other people spend their working lives enabling this.
Where the walk can take you through large, unspoilt landscapes, with wonderful views.
Where those landscapes - the pitches of this game we’re imagining - can be found all across the world, in deserts and mountains, valleys and cities.
Where the pitch is part of the wider environment, with large areas of open space and habitat protected from development.
Where the flora and fauna are not only part of the picture, they are the canvas on which and through which the game is played.
Where that canvas, that pitch, will be different every time it is used, a living thing adapting to the conditions on any given day just as the player must.
Where the weather is part of the challenge, an important element rather than a deterrent.
Where the player can play all year round.
Where you have to work hard to earn results, but you still have fun trying.
Where luck plays a role, and the players come to accept this with grace.
Where respect for the course and the opponent are ingrained in the codes of the game.
Where the challenge of the game itself builds honour and humility in the young and the old, keeping the player’s attitude honest, and quickly quashing pride.
Where the players can be as young as four or five, and as old as the hills.
Where the generations can play together, passing down this blessing of the game like the rituals of an ancient secret, or a martial art.
Where the gentle exercise, sense of community and mental stimulation actually extends lifespan for its participants.
Where injuries are rare, and the ones that are sustained often provide comedy value rather than true horror.
Where the equipment needn’t cost a fortune, and will last for years.
Where a system exists that enables players of all skill levels and abilities to play against each other, with an adjustment made to keep the game interesting.
Where the game brings the rich and the poor to their knees without discrimination, then picks them back up with a glimmer of hope.
Where the player can play against an opponent, or a field of them, or against themselves or the course, and have fun in each situation.
Where every time, the player will hit one or more shots that could have been played by the greats of the game, and that is enough to keep them coming back.
Where the players build precious memories each time they play, and will travel further afield with friends to enjoy new adventures whenever life permits.
Where the friendships and memories the players make will last a lifetime and beyond.
Where every single player who has ever played wished they could play more, and always wants to get that little bit better.
Where the converted, the player, will rarely sing the praises of the game, but will instead go quietly about their business with a smile, like they’ve discovered a wonderful, unforgettable secret.
There we are, all done. Wasn’t so hard, was it, but I will print this list out so you can have a look at it later.
“Where do you find this game?”, you ask?
Dear Non-Golfer, this is golf I am describing for you. You see diamond sweaters, and huge entrance gates, and wealthy touring professionals, and front page lawsuits, but that is just the noise around the edges. Look beyond all that for a moment, and you find that golf really isn’t any of that, for almost everyone who plays it. The game itself is simple - hit the ball, walk after it, repeat. Golf is the gem at the centre of all that industry that has been built around it, the time spent on the course. In the simple act of play.
I dare say there are other things that ought to be on the list, but it’s a start. So perhaps it’s time to stop labelling yourself as a Non-Golfer, or the Golfer as a deluded fool (though you might come to realise there is some truth in that perception, and that you will remain a Golfer in spite of it!), and pick up a club and give it a try.
Unless you know of any other games that have all this and more? If so, I’m all ears. Oh, and by the way…you can also bring your dog along. Two birds, one stone. Just tell her not to bark at the top of my backswing.
Thank you for reading this, and if you are subscribed, or have helped spread the word about these musings via email or social media, I am hugely grateful. If not, please do!!!
You can find a link to some other pieces here, and please also consider following my twitter feed here. Thank you, sincerely!